I went to a family reunion this past weekend. Little Lucy Robinson took a shine to me, and would not leave my side. She was a little chatterbox, who was overjoyed to share her commentary on nearly everything.
“Is that your real beard? What animal do you hate the most? Grasshoppers aren’t scary. Know what? Mom hid daddy’s keys until he gave her 100 dollars before he went to go play golf.”
“Are you a writer? My dad said writers are like bums with typewriters. Can you twerk? I can twerk, my cousins showed me last night. Wanna see?”
“What do you do if you can’t think of anything to write? Does you ever feel like a clown? Have you ever gotten paint in your armpits? What about your butt?”
“Hot dogs are my favorite food, unless they’re cheese hot dogs. ‘Cause then cheese hotdogs are my favorite food.”
“Sometimes I get cranky. But then I go to the bathroom and then I’m not cranky anymore.”