Today is an important day. Maybe one of the most important of my life. I have been looking forward to this day since childhood, and now that it’s here I don’t know how to feel.
Today is National Cow Appreciation Day.
Now, I know what you’re thinking. You didn’t even know there was such a holiday. But it turns out there is. And in honor of this day, my wife’s 2003 Dodge Durango died in the post office parking lot with us inside it.
It was ninety-eight degrees outside. I tried to flag someone for help. Many of these people simply waved at me, then pointed to their wristwatches, and drove away.
So that’s where I am now, waiting for a tow truck, writing to you on my phone.
But like I said, nothing can bring me down today. Nothing. Because you know what else today is? The Major League Baseball All-Star Game.
That’s right. All year, we baseball fans have been waiting for our
favorite players to form the All-Star team.
These are professional athletes who play the sport purely out of love. And also, because they make millions of dollars and sometimes throw huge parties on their yachts wherein partygoers drink so much champagne they push the piano overboard.
That's not why today is special, either. No, sir. Today has nothing to do with cattle, or baseball, or Dodge Durangos that are as dead as iced catfish.
Today is important because of an orange hardback book, stolen from the Nashville Public Library in the early 1980’s.
Let me explain:
This old dusty book dates back to my late father, who was an avid reader. He was a blue-collar man who worked on steel every day of his life, and he read two or three books per week.
I remember him reading this exact book when I…