I receive a lot of questions every day. I wish I could answer them all. But if I actually tried to answer every message, email, letter, smoke signal, etc., I’d need a permanent ureteral catheter installed.
Many of these questions are of a spiritual/religious nature. I have found that the most vocal readers are often the most religious. So, I have never done this before, but I have compiled these commonly asked questions here:
Q: What happened to the old Sean? I used to like reading his work because he was funny. I’m not a fan now. Ever since he walked the Camino de Santiago, Sean’s writings have taken on more of a spiritual nature. Will the old Sean ever come back?
A: You must be new here.
Q: Why do you say that?
A: Because I’ve been writing a column every day for 12 years. In that time, I have written about almost everything from nostril hair to (really) slug excrement.
I have been writing spiritual stuff from the beginning, too. This is evidenced by a Google search I did on myself. I typed in: “Sean Dietrich quotes spiritual.” Here are a few snippets from columns I wrote in 2013:
“God invented beer. Deal with it.”
“I don’t mean to suggest God is a woman. But if God is indeed male, then who stands around telling Him what to do all day?”
So we can see that there is a much deeper side to me.
Q: What exactly happened out there on the Camino anyway?
A: What happens on the Camino stays on the Camino.
Q: Will you be writing a book about the Camino?
A: It’s almost finished. I think I will entitle it “Chevrolet’s worst idea.”
Q: Hi Sean, I am a devout Christian, and sometimes I wonder about your salvation. Can you tell me if you’re plugged into a church, or which denomination you belong to?
A: Certainly. I am National League.
Q: So you’re not going to answer the question? Do you belong to a church denomination?
A: I would not want to be a member of any denomination that would accept me as a member.
Q: I was reading your column where you made fun of Jerry Falwell once. Do you know what out-and-out sin that is? Do you know what God does when you attack His anointed for a cheap laugh? Do you really think you will escape the punishment that awaits?
A: Would that we could all be as pure as Jerry Falwell.
Q: Why do you pick on the Baptists so much? What do you have against them? I’m Church of Christ. Can’t you make fun of us, too?
A: A Church of Christ minister walked into a bar. We are still waiting for him to leave.
Q: How dare you quote God. I know you meant it to be funny, but your recent imaginary dialogue with God was offensive and honestly ridiculous. I don’t believe the Almighty is just “one of the guys” as you claim. Sir, I think you would be shocked at what My God would say to you if He opened His mouth.
A: Then let’s both pray your God keeps His mouth shut.
Q: I notice on the few occasions you have quoted the Bible, and you quote from many different translations. I have stopped reading your work because of this. I mean no offense to you, personally, but there are not different “versions” of God’s Word. There is only one, and I hope you see this someday.
A: A lot of fundamentalist Americans are ready to die in defense of their interpretation of the Bible. Very few are willing to do the same for a foster kid.
Q: I am considering walking the Camino de Santiago. Is it really as life transforming as you made it sound in your writings?
A: I walked the Camino for 40 days and 40 nights with my wife. Since I have come back to the US, nothing has been the same.
For two nights, I almost slept on the floor because my bed felt too soft. I still have dreams every night. Dreams that seem to mean something.
And whenever I talk to people, I see them differently. I get this strong sense that we are all little children, like babies. Sometimes we are misguided, sometimes we’re downright insane, but just like babies, we are so loved.
So loved, in fact, that I can’t quit thinking about this immense love that surrounds us, every moment of every day. Each one of us. Loved.
Christian and Muslim. Gentile and Jew. Catholic and Protestant. Russian and Ukrainian. Israeli and Palestinian. Republican and Democrat. Straight and gay. Red and Yellow, Black and White. There is such a deep, holy love surrounding you and me that it almost robs me of my breath. The world’s issues are not for me to solve. But I can, however, embrace this love.
Q: Sean, are these questions real, or do you make some of them up?
A: I made up one of them. Nobody is actually named Jerry Falwell.