It was only an experiment. I wanted to see if I could change America in only one day by being the nicest person on earth for 24 hours.
I’m not talking normal-nice. I’m talking OBSCENELY nice. I’m talking do-you-need-a-kidney nice.
It should be noted, I’m not nice in real life. I’m just a regular person. Sure, I’d like to consider myself friendly—kind of. And, certainly, if a motorist on the highway has a flat tire I always pray for them as I speed by.
“But what if I acted differently today?” I thought to myself. I wondered, would niceness actually change this country?
“Being nice can change the world,” I’ve often heard it said.
So I conducted research.
And so it was, I started my day by forcing myself to smile. Not just sometimes, mind you. But ALL the time. For the entire day. When I showered, I smiled. When I drank coffee: smiled.
Because niceness starts with oneself, I’ve been told. Which is why when I combed my hair, I repeatedly told my reflection how handsome he
was.
Next, I took my dog for a walk and I smiled whenever I passed other dog-walkers who were solemnly on their potty-walks before sunrise, caffeine deprived and dismal, with right hands snugly covered by Little Blue Baggies of Death. I hope you never learn about Little Blue Baggie of Death.
I smiled bigly. I made eye contact. I’d like to think my smiling made these people feel good because many of them picked up their pace. In fact, some of them started walking so fast they were practically sprinting away from me.
The next thing I did to change America was offer to help people in public, even if they didn’t need it.
There was, for example, the old man at the store who couldn’t get his buggy unstuck from a mess of shopping carts. So I helped him.
When I…