“Should I make my bed every morning?” the email began.

The writer of the letter is a 24-year-old who I’ll call Jerry. Jerry is in graduate school. His major is in medicine. He is—without getting too technical—a grown freaking man.

“My dad is a Army colonel,” Jerry went on, “who used to spank me if I didn’t make the bed each morning. …He believes making the bed is setting oneself up for success.

“But now that I’m on my own, I don’t make my bed, and I know Dad is disappointed in me. It even makes him mad at me. What do you think, Sean?”

Well, Jerry. The way I see it, there are two camps.

There is the camp that believes making the bed improves your mental health and propels you toward wealth and success. And there is the camp that believes in eating Cocoa Puffs out of a dirty bowl found in the sink that has not been washed since the Clinton administration.

I belong to the latter camp.

That isn’t to say I don’t believe in making the bed. It’s just that I conscientiously choose to abstain.

Namely, because there are more important things in my morning routine than the condition of my sheets. Such as, strong coffee, properly cooked eggs, Gary Larson, and the importance of relief pitching in a National League lineup.

The problem is, this world rewards Type-A behavior. We learn about these rewards young. Authority figures are constantly telling us:

“Wake up early!” “study hard!” “brush your teeth” “go to college,” “get a good job,” “eat right,” “exercise,” “invest in an IRA,” “don’t eat cholesterol,” “buy a nice car,” “be a success,” “get your kids into the right school,” “and don’t forget to brush your teeth!”

But did you know that you can go one week without brushing your teeth before your enamel starts to fail? That’s right. You have seven days.

So don’t misunderstand, I’m not saying you should quit cleaning your teeth. Your armpits, yes. But not your teeth.

What I’m saying is, where are the healthy voices in our society encouraging people to chill out?

Where are the voices saying: “Sleep in,” “take today off,” “do something fun,” “get a job you like, not one that pays well,” “skip class and go for a hike,” “eat that extra piece of pizza,” “go ahead, you can sing karaoke.”

No, these things might not lead toward a traditional kind of success. But what is success, anyway? Having nice stuff? Having people respect you? Having a great job?

What about the success of living stress free? Isn’t that success too?

What about the success of not being at risk for a cardiac infarction? What about the success being free enough not to be controlled by other people’s expectations?

I’m not qualified to give you any advice, Jerry. And I’m certainly not suggesting making your bed is going to give you a hear attack. A stroke, maybe. But not a heart attack.

What I AM saying is that too many American workaholics spend their first 50 years ruining their health, only to spend their final 30 trying to insure it.