DEAR SEAN:
I’m pregnant. My husband and I have been going back and forth on name options but have no ideas. So right now I have a baby without a name. I know this is a strange request, but can you give me some name suggestions? I don’t want one of those modern names.
Thanks,
NEW-MOM-IN-GRAND-RAPIDS
DEAR GRAND-RAPIDS:
The night I was born, my mother took me into her arms and decided that she was going to name me Elvis.
My aunt recalls: “Your mama loved Elvis. Plus, you were a Capricorn, you know. Elvis and Jesus were Capricorns.”
Case closed.
In the end, my mother gave me a Scot-Irish name. But over the years I’ve wondered about how differently my life would have played out if my mother would have gone with Elvis.
PATROLMAN: License and registration, please, sir?
ME: Here you are, officer.
HIM: Do you know how fast you were driving back there…. (looks at license) Elvis?
ME: Uh-huh-uh-huh
As a writer, when you start working on a novel, the first thing you think about are the names of your characters. In fact, names are one of the most important parts of any story. Think about it. How many pieces of classic literature do you read where the hero was named Heman Pickles?
You do, however, have to be careful when you give opinions on names you like and dislike because feelings can get hurt very easily. My mother and aunt once got into a knock-down-drag-out argument after my aunt admitted that she never liked my mother’s name.
My mother was fuming. She stood from her chair and informed my aunt that she never liked my aunt’s name, either. Things got ugly. My mother said my aunt’s name reminded her of a barefoot and pregnant hick—my aunt at the time, was barefoot, also pregnant.
So then my aunt said my mother had a bad singing voice and that her cornbread was never done in the middle. I had to break up the fight by singing “Don’t Be Cruel.”
My own feelings have been hurt over the subject of names. One of my favorite writers once stated in print that, quote, names like “Brittany, Kristen, and Sean,” were modern, and therefore silly names. It crushed me. Deeply.
First off, the name Sean is not modern. The name Sean dates back to the 1100s. My mother’s family is Scot-Irish, and there were famous men named Sean within my ancestry, men who influenced the course of history. Foremost of which was Sean MacGavin, the son of a blacksmith who, in 1219 A.D., composed the timeless melody “99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall” for the glory of the King.
But let’s get down to business and cut the small-talk. You asked about names, and I’m going to give you a few:
If we’re talking girls, I’m a big fan of antique names like Myrtle, Myrtis, Hazel, Edna, Betsy, Ethel, Cora, Rose, Zelda, Penelope, and Daisy. My great grandmother was named Beva, one of my favorites. You don’t hear names like Beva anymore.
Young parents shy away from certain antique names because they think they sound like old-lady names. But I disagree. There’s no such thing as an old lady name. One of my favorite names is Edna.
For boys, I especially like names that, for some reason, fell out of fashion. Names like Leroy, Merel, Wyatt, Wally, Jasper, Felix, Ezra, and Elroy, Elmore, and Wylie, and Alvin.
I had a good friend named Wyatt. I like that name.
Personally, I’ve always thought a name was one of the most important elements of a person’s jumpstart in life. Your name is the first thing anyone will ever say about you. Your name is the last thing that will be ever be written about you.
You will go through some very hard times in life no matter who you are, no matter what circumstances you come from. Your life at some point is going to suck. Within these darkened hours, your name will sometimes be one of the only things you have left.
A name will outlive you for generations. A name is one of the only tangible parts of yourself that people will still be using long after your remains are dust.
As a kid, my mother was always quick to remind me that the name Sean meant, literally, “God has been gracious.” I didn’t pay attention to her words at that age, I was too busy eating dirt, and just generally being a brat. But when I got older I went through a very difficult period, a period I didn’t think I was going to survive, and my name actually meant something to me.
One night, I got to thinking about my name’s meaning, and it made me warm all over because I realized that I’d never thought about how four simple letters could have been so foretelling.
So I’m running out of room here. The truth is, it really doesn’t matter what I think about a name, but if you ask me—which you did—whether it’s a boy or girl, my vote is for Elvis Aaron Presley.
6 comments
stephen e acree - March 12, 2024 12:56 pm
My daughter is named Presley. Her mom loved Elvis. She was only 7 when Elvis died. I have never really understood it. But I love my daughter’s name.
Dee Thompson - March 12, 2024 1:25 pm
Great column. I’ve always liked the name Sean. You left out Maude and Fanny Mae, excellent classic names… I was named for my grandmother Cordelia, but my dad thought that was too long [he was a terrible speller] so he insisted it be shortened, to Dee. As a kid I was annoyed by it because all my teachers asked me on the first day what my REAL name was and I had to sometimes get my mom involved because it was assumed I was lying. When I grew up and learned more about my grandmother — who died before I was born — I was happy to be named for her, in spirit.
Dan-O - March 12, 2024 1:44 pm
My grandmother’s name was Cleopatra, but it was pronounced with a hard a (Cle-o-PAY-tra), she had two sisters named Rosebud and Minneola, and two brothers named Tarver and Diver. My grandfather’s middle initial was J, which did not stand for anything, just J. His sister was named Lucile (she named herself after years of being called Baby Sister), and it was shorted to just Cile, and now my niece carries the name Cile also. I was supposed to be named either Luverne or Lafayette, and I’m very grateful that my parents went a different way and named me after an Irish ballad, “O Danny Boy”, instead. Whenever I come across a name that can be pronounced more than one way, I always ask that they pronounce it for me first, so that I don’t mangle the pronunciation. Names are an important part of our identity, so it’s a matter of respect that they be said properly.
Fay Ferrell - March 12, 2024 5:51 pm
A NAME is such an integral part of of one’s identity! I always strive both to pronounce and spell an individual’s name correctly. (Admittedly, this is more challenging today than during my rural childhood, surrounded by like urchins, all with WASP names.) Dubbed Madeline Fay, after mother (Madeline Elizabeth) and maternal grandmother, I figure I lucked up, as Big Mama was Beulah Fay. While perceiving Beulah Land as a desirable place, I just never felt as if “Beulah” would have been a good fit. Might I have grown up to be a missionary?…or a pole dancer? Under the influence of the first of my two colorful ex-husbands, I both caught and sold cottonmouth moccasins to be milked to make antivenin, and was a bootlegger, producing a high quality product at a reasonable price. As to the metamorphosis of girls’ names over the decades…RHONDA was quite popular during the ’50s, probably influenced by the redhead Rhonda Fleming. Could be that the Beach Boys resurrected the name with “Hep’ Me, Rhonda!” I recently visited Helen Keller Hall, my old Auburn dorm that I shared with a Helen and a Judy. Names on the door currently are Jordyn (with a “y”) and Brianne. And an art gallery I visited a few days ago exhibited art by local 10th graders…winners were Emmalyn, Kaylan, and Marin! ALL of the names you love, Sean, are first rate, particularly Leroy…but my rescued Treein’ Walker hound dawg insists that it is LEE’Roy, with the emphasis on LEE!
Fay Ferrell - March 12, 2024 6:12 pm
A NAME is such an integral part of one’s identity! I always strive both to pronounce and to spell an individual’s name correctly. (Admittedly, this is more challenging today than during my rural youth, surrounded by similar urchins, all with WASP names.) Dubbed “Madeline Fay” after my mother (Madeline Elizabeth) and maternal grandmother, I figure I lucked up, as Big Mama’s name was “BEULAH Fay.” While perceiving Beulah Land as a desirable place, I just never felt as if “Beulah” fit me. Might I have grown up to be a Missionary to lands where Kuru was practiced?..or, perhaps, a Pole Dancer? Actually, under the influence of the first of my two colorful ex-husbands, my early careers had me catching and selling cottonmouth moccasins to be milked to make antivenin and bootlegging, selling a high quality product at a reasonable price. As to the metamorphosis of girls’ names over the decades…RHONDA was quite popular during the 1950s, probably due to Rhonda Fleming, the redheaded actress. Could be that The Beach Boys resurrected the name in 1965 with “Hep’ Me, Rhonda!” When recently visiting Helen Keller Hall, 1961 freshman dorm of my Auburn days, with roomies Judy and Helen, I noted names currently on the door were Jordyn (with a “y”) and Brianne. And an art gallery last week featured paintings by local 10th graders.
Winners were Emmalyn, Kaylan, and Marin. ALL of the names you love, Sean, are first rate, particularly Leroy…but my rescued Treein’ Walker hound insists that it is LEE’Roy, with the emphasis on the LEE!
Lori aka Queen - March 12, 2024 7:56 pm
Our mother’s and her mother’s middle name was Ethel…Maude Ethel but she did not like the Maude part. I have never met but one other Ethel and I am in my sixites. I lurve the name Sean btw!