I just saw a television commercial that made me blush. The starved-looking swimsuit model on the screen wasn’t wearing enough to floss her teeth with. I don’t even know what the ad was selling—nor do I give a flannel.
Look, I’m not complaining. God help me, I’m not.
Yes I am.
What happened to women? I’m talking real figures and Grecian curvature? Once upon a time, girls had meat on their bones and weren’t afraid to finish off a fried chicken drumstick? There wasn’t a thing wrong with them.
My grandaddy once said, “Boy, the best advice I can give you: marry a woman who wears cotton panties and eats until she’s good and full.”
I gave a confused look.
He went on, “The sort of lady who wears expensive, satin britches and eats like a bird, she’s trouble.”
Trouble.
I’ve thought about that my whole life. Subsequently, I also learned Grandaddy’s advice isn’t something you bring up at your mama’s Bible study—unless you want the Jesus slapped out of you with a hairbrush.
Admittedly, I’m inclined to agree with Grandaddy. But then, I come from a long line of redneck women. Strong and firm ladies, who could clean a chicken carcass, sweep the porch, hang laundry, and kiss your skinned knees during the same afternoon.
We’ve done modern girls wrong.
My friend’s teenage daughter claims she’s afraid to eat in front of boys. She’s a brunette beauty whose PE teacher told her she was overweight. The entire class calculated body-fat percentages on computers.
This played havoc on the girl’s mind. She quit eating suppers, started living at the gym. She even began vomiting after meals. One day, she passed out at school. They sent her to a shrink.
The doc suggested putting her on a diet.
God help us. I’m no psychologist, but we don’t need any more carb-counting. We need women unafraid. We need less size-zeroes, less two-pieces, and more women proud of their iron skillets. Fewer X-rated commercials, more Aunt Bee reruns.
A woman is a human being. She has a real face—one that looks good without makeup. She has a figure that’s unique. And an appetite. For life, love, humor, and hickory smoked ham.
She’s designed to laugh until she snorts, to enjoy rich desserts, and to cuss from time to time. She wears what she likes, talks as loud as she wants, sips beer from a can, and sees the universe in her own way.
She’s a female. God created her for changing the world, raising families, and making a boy feel like a man.
She’s not perfect. She’s downright flawless.
To hell with swimsuit ads.
28 comments
Pamela Lacey - October 7, 2016 1:19 pm
Thank you for making my day! I’m starting my day on a positive note and thinking about getting my iron skillet out and frying chicken for dinner tonight. On a serious note, I do appreciate the message in Sean’s article today, and hope that the women out there who feel the pressure of today’s body conscious society get a chance to read this article.
Thank you!
Vicki claxton - May 1, 2017 7:00 pm
I am 63 and am a size 0. Not by choice at all! And I could not agree more what you posted about women! But I have such a hard time keeping weight on me! I eat whatever I want and still stay small! I wish people would realize that not all too thin women do it on purpose! The struggle is just as real for me as it is for the normal size beautiful women!! Just my two cents worth!
Peggy Miller - October 14, 2016 11:58 pm
Love it, and everything else you write! I look forward each time that I take a break with Sean!!!
Elaine Walizer - October 28, 2016 2:28 pm
I’m at an age where, frankly, the best-looking part of me is my legs (as long as you don’t mind a few spider veins.). I went on a diet 5 years ago–not because I thought I’d be better-looking, but because I didn’t feel good. I was bending over, trying to tie my shoe-laces, and found myself huffing and puffing. I was on 3 different blood-pressure meds. And finally I’d had enough. It took 18 long months of self-control (I even gave up coffee because of the half-and-half) and exercise–daily treadmill work; I lost 35 lbs. About every ten or twelve pounds, the doc had to drop one of the BP meds because I was so dizzy. I’ve kept the weight off for 4 years now. I’m not slim at 145 lbs, but I feel better and I’m off all the meds. My energy is good. Plus I got a bunch of new clothes ;0).
I was effortlessly thin all of my young life–very poor training for middle age and post-menopause–but I think you could say I traded in my lissome figure for two kids and a lot of wisdom. Enough to appreciate Sean of the South and hope the message spreads.
Shela - November 16, 2016 8:17 pm
Such a sweet & honest sentiment… I agree with you 100% on the wisdom thing and Sean of the South….his Miss’s is one lucky lady.
Robin - May 1, 2017 9:18 pm
I could have written your post myself! I am struggling to get my weight down to where you are now. I am one of those chicken cookinh and eating ladies Sean describes. I wish I could go back to the days of eating whatever I wanted without turning into a 250 lb. health mess. I feel your pain!
Deborah Alford - October 28, 2016 2:47 pm
Sean you have an insight into the world that so many people need!!????I? cook with a iron skillet.
Michael Hawke - January 16, 2017 1:23 am
See you the 28th in Dothan. I am a fan.
Jack Jackson - May 1, 2017 2:13 pm
God bless you, Sean. Pretty women are nice to look at, but most seem to have their priorities wrong.
The second time, I married better…
Pcm - May 1, 2017 3:14 pm
Barf
Sherry - May 1, 2017 10:57 pm
To the person who replied ( Barf ) you friend NEED HELP . GOD BLESS and I will pray for you.
Deanna - May 1, 2017 5:07 pm
? love it!
Jennifer - May 1, 2017 5:40 pm
Appreciate the sentiment for sure. Still don’t think there’s anything wrong with bikinis or looking/feeling fit. ❤️?
Dana - May 1, 2017 6:18 pm
Sean…. I don’t know you …. but this southern gal sure does love you and your pearls of wisdom?
Lilli Ann Snow - May 1, 2017 7:04 pm
“A good man…(wrote Flannery)…is hard to find.”
Thank God for your voice and what we hear from it.
I want everyone to find you, Sean.
Everyone.
Nancy - May 1, 2017 7:29 pm
I understand what you are saying, but not all thin people are dieting. My daughter is maybe a size 2. She’s under so much stress that she’s getting A-fib. She says people are always asking her how she does it and telling her how jealous they are.
Becky Hastings - May 1, 2017 9:26 pm
I love this. Every single bit. We’ve become a society so worried about what other people want and like that we forget about who we are. I like food. I’m not a size 0. I want to smile more and feel the sun on my face (even if it gives me wrinkles). We are beautiful, unique creations and we should remember to live like it!
Thank you for your perfect reminder!
Martha - May 1, 2017 9:39 pm
Thank you for this! Brought tears to my eyes because on some days, I’m just not sure I am good enough. This reminds me that I am. Always.
Debbie - May 2, 2017 12:28 am
Thank you Sean. I’m one of those southern girls who doesn’t care what other people think. I don’t wear makeup. I eat what I want and when I want. I dress for comfort. I drink my wine in aTupperware glass. And my husband tells me every day that I’m as beautiful today as the day we met. Which was 47 years ago.
Sarah - May 2, 2017 1:30 am
I read this the first time it was posted…and the second…and I’ll keep reading it. every.single.time. You remind me that there are good men, who adore real women. No matter our size, no matter our age, no matter our wrinkles, and jiggly bits. Thank you, and bless your sweet heart 😉
Lori Parker - May 2, 2017 4:24 pm
I agree with the thoughts, but labeling those women as ‘trouble’ seems like victim-shaming at best. Trust me, no woman wants to grow up getting the message that she’s disgusting if she eats until she’s not hungry anymore, or that she’s not desirable unless her physical body looks a certain way. What’s the true trouble is the message society sends these women. So many ads, people, themes, etc shame them if they’re not perfect, and then we mock them for trying to fit those norms. Compassion all around would be more helpful. I am not a skinny woman by a long shot, but to say only ‘real women’ have curves is a disservice, too. We all deserve love and compassion, no matter our clothing size or body type. XO
Pat - May 2, 2017 6:52 pm
In Your effort to make some women feel good about themselves, you are bashing others. How about just letting women be whoever they want to be. Said as someone who is definitely NOT a size 2 and adores fried chicken, but has many salad-loving, size 2 friends. And none of us wear cotton panties….microfiber is much more comfortable.
Kelly Mine - May 2, 2017 8:43 pm
Your article has just saved my sanity. Please tell me that you are not the only red-blooded American man that feels this way.
Rebecca Sowell - May 3, 2017 12:18 am
Sean Deitrich, I think I love you! Thank you for making my day. I am reminded of something I heard years ago. “Skinny girls are like pants with no pockets. Where do you put your hands?” Thank goodness I have plenty of “pocket space”.
Shelby Ingram - May 3, 2017 3:59 am
Sean,
I usually love your pieces. Your writing style is fantastic and I really admire it. But I feel compelled to let you know that this particular piece is unsettling.
I believe the people reading this (and perhaps you yourself) believe that you are a champion for women, but in fact, the opposite is true according to this post.
I wholeheartedly agree with you that a women need never be ashamed of her body or her face without makeup. I think it’s absolutely ridiculous that some women are made to feel ashamed of eating in front of others, especially in front of men. I think diets are pointless and miserable, and that women should eat whatever/whenever/wherever they like.
I agree that women, and men, should “laugh until [they] snort, to enjoy rich desserts, and to cuss from time to time.” I especially agree that a women “wears what she likes, talks as loud as she wants, sips beer from a can, and sees the universe in her own way.” It’s ironic that the beginning of your piece talked of a women wearing something small “enough to floss her teeth with,” as if that’s not okay. You were right when you said a woman should wear what she likes, but I think when you wrote that, you were thinking of what YOU like. If a woman likes to wear what you consider “floss”, she should be able wear that without being called less of a women. You said we need “less two-pieces.” There is absolutely nothing wrong with wearing a two piece bathing suit. Wearing “immodest” clothing does not detract from a woman’s heart, soul, spirit or worth. In addition, you stated that “We need less size-zeroes, ” I’ve got news for you- some women could beat you in an eating contest and still fit in size zeroes. That’s just the way their bodies are. Women whose clothing tags say zero are not less valuable than women who wear any other size.
Also, you said women are designed “for changing the world,” which I agree with. You said they are made for “raising families,” which in fact is not something every woman is meant to do, and she is no less for it. She has that choice. Finally, you said women are made for “making a boy feel like a man.” That is sexism if I’ve ever heard it. Women are so much more than that, and were not put here to please men.
I know with certainty you meant no harm in this post, and in fact meant to praise women. You did that, but at the same time made some very sexist statements that may warrant re-evaluation.
Theresa - May 3, 2017 1:46 pm
Really? Relax and enjoy life a little. You don’t have to be politically correct every minute
Theresa - May 3, 2017 1:44 pm
I love it! It is so true. I raised my daughter to be that special woman. Thanks for putting it in to words!
Lisa - May 3, 2017 6:09 pm
Sean, where have you been all my life? Have you written any books? I certainly hope you’re compiling your blog posts for a new volume of your wit and wisdom!