My first week owning a dumb phone has been, well, dumb. In fact, it’s been so uneventful, I’m not totally sure what to do with myself.
It’s been seven days since I exchanged my smartphone for a flip phone constructed with technology predating the Cold War. This is an attempt to curb my smartphone addiction.
The first thing you learn when quitting your phone is that it’s actually pretty easy to stop using your smartphone as long as you follow an important rule known as: Using Your Wife’s Smartphone.
The first few days without my iPhone were the toughest. I’d wander through rooms, iPhoneless, unsure of what I was supposed to be doing.
Also, your days feel longer. I keep looking at my watch and saying, “I can’t believe it’s so early.” In a way, it’s isolating, too. Sort of like being incarcerated, except you have your shoelaces.
It’s even weirder when you’re out in public. I went to get my haircut yesterday. Everyone in the waiting room was thumbing away on screens. And there I was, just sitting.
There were no magazines. No pamphlets. Nothing. So I had nothing to look at. I just sort of gazed around the room, observing stuff. I didn’t realize how truly insane you appear to other people when you don’t have a phone to glare at.
A lady glanced up from her device and noticed me just looking around the room like Anthony Perkins, whereupon she grabbed the hand of her toddler and—this is true—moved to the other side of the room.
I’ve also noticed my urge to “look things up” is starting to disappear. I can’t explain this urge I have to constantly Google stupid things. I have it all the time.
I’ll be in a conversation and someone will casually mention something like, for example, Bruce Willis. Then, I will think to myself, “I wonder where Bruce Willis grew up.” This thought makes me a spastic conversationlist who is constantly pausing discussions to fact check stuff nobody cares about.
Well, without a device, I have come to realize that IT DOES NOT MATTER WHERE BRUCE WILLIS GREW UP.
I’ve been reading a lot of books, too. And, I’ve started reading newspapers again. I love newspapers, but newspapers are NOTHING like they used to be. Sometimes, you wonder whether anyone is even editing these papers based on misprints in the headlines.
Here are some actual recent headlines:
“China allegedly using the sea to hide its submarines.”
“Sharks win local soccer tournament 1-1.”
“US population to double by 2050, babies to blame.”
And my favorite:
“Number of dropouts concerns local shools.”
That said, living without a smartphone has been nice. Without constantly scrolling, I have noticed my creativity returning. I’m able to sustain focus longer.
And most importantly, I feel MUCH calmer. This is probably because I no longer see political posts from my uncle, or social-media clickbait articles entitled: “Shaking hands linked to cancer.”
Overall, I can already tell I feel more relaxed and considerably more present in this moment. I like this feeling.
And after one week without a smartphone, I think I’ll keep going, although I don’t know how long I’ll be able to last.
Bruce Willis grew up in Carneys Point, New Jersey.